Stop chasing success and start pursuing significance

ROSHAN THIRAN

LAST month, I shared the stage with Patch Adams at the Gathering of the Great Minds. Patch Adams is building a legacy of greatness through his simple message of love.

Patch was a renegade medical student who vowed to build a hospital where no one would ever have to pay for care. Upon becoming a physician, he immediately invited patients into his home, and for 12 years lived with his wife, two children, four other physicians and as many as 50 homeless patients. He has never turned anyone away and never charged a penny for care during these years. He has treated tens of thousands of patients out of love with nothing asked in return.

Years later, Patch set up the Gesundheit Institute which offers free, holistic medical care to everyone.

Patch Adams uses love and humour to heal, creating a legacy that will outlive him.

Patch learnt love from his mother. His father was killed in the military when he was only six and since then he has championed love in everything, including in business. Patch, now 65 years old (and famous from the movie about him!) uses love and humour to heal, creating a great legacy that will outlive him.

As the year winds down, it may be a good time to consider the legacies we leave behind. An ancient proverb says, if you lead a meaningful life, you never really die. Instead, you break into 1,000 pieces, each of which stays alive within the people whose lives you've touched along the way.

I recently read about Nick and his wife Drana. Nick was a great businessman who earned enough to make most of their dreams come true. Their children were set to follow their similar route to success. But Nick and Drana decided that they did not want the same success for their kids. Instead they wanted to raise their kids to achieve significance.

They realised that they needed to change their own lives from a successful one to an enduring one. They opened their home to strangers, started serving instead of receiving, volunteered and helped countless people. Their youngest daughter, Agnes, decided that she would devote her life to being significant. She was smart, pretty and industrious and knew these were keys to being successful, but she learnt from her parents that to be significant, her heart, character and love were more critical.

In 1997 Agnes passed away and I was asked to do a TV obituary special on Agnes. The world knew Agnes as Mother Teresa. Her parent's decision to forego success in lieu of significance ensured that their legacy lived on in their daughter and lives on today in millions of lives affected by Agnes' grace and mercy.

Great leaders leave legacies that transcend them. Ken Blachard says, Many people measure their success by wealth, recognition, power, and status. There's nothing wrong with those, but if that's all you're focused on, you're missing the boat. Instead focus on significance.

The Wright Brothers focused on significance not to become rich but to change the world through flight. Their competitor Samuel Langley worked tirelessly for monetary success in aviation. Langley was never successful.

In July 2006, Enron founder, Kenneth Lay died, leaving a tainted legacy. Jeffrey Skilling, Bernie Ebbers (Worldcom), John Rigas (Adelphia), Dennis Kozlowski (Tyco) were CEOs focused on short-term monetary success which ended in shameful legacies. Lee Iacocca and Jack Welch painstakingly built their businesses on solid foundations, achieving a leadership legacy admired the world over.

Have you given thought to your legacy? Will your legacy be like Jack Welch, Nelson Mandela, Patch Adams, Steve Jobs or Nick and Drana who raised Agnes to greatness? Or will your legacy be tarnished by deception, misdeeds, shame, regret, hypocrisy, or a failure to reach your potential?

Legacy is a powerful word closely associated with leadership. We are all leaders. Parents are leaders. Teachers are leaders. If you lead one person, you are a leader and have a responsibility to leave a positive legacy.

Wikipedia describes legacy as something handed down from an ancestor or predecessor or from the past; or something acquired without compensation. It is synonymous with birthright, inheritance, heritage and tradition. Leaders create and pass down legacies.

So, how does one start one's journey of building a lasting legacy? The answer begins by taking an inventory of yourself. You need to find out what makes you tick. It starts with passion.

Legacies are built on passion

A recent survey indicates that 75% of the world's population are unaware what their true passion is. Finding your true passion isn't as simple as it seems. Asking yourself some pertinent questions like what puts a smile on your face, what do you find easy to do or what sparks your creativity may help begin this journey of discovering your passion.

Steve Jobs had a lot of time in honest soul searching before he figured his true passion. Doing what you have a passion for brings out your best, and this leads to greatness. Greatness is the starting point of significance.

Legacies are built on significance

Mother Teresa's parents, Nick and Drana, consciously made a decision to move away from chasing success to chasing significance. Patch Adams made a resolution as a medical student to move away from being a rich, successful doctor to making a significant impact in medicine. How do you move from pursuing success to significance?

Here are a few questions that may help you:

1. Who am I?

2. Why am I here?

3. Where should I be going?

4. How will I get there?

5. When I get there, will I feel significant?

You can also make a list of the 10 most significant achievements of your life and why it was significant. As you discover where your deepest passions intersect with your greatest abilities, you begin your blueprint for significance.

Two construction workers were asked to describe their same jobs. The first employee says his job was to lay bricks. The second says he was building a cathedral. Which employee would you hire? The second employee works for significance while the first works for a pay-cheque.

I spent two years working at Johnson and Johnson. In 1942, Gen Robert Wood Johnson wrote a one-page document that came to be known as the J&J Credo. The Credo outlines the company's priority and responsibility to conducting business firstly to people who use its products, secondly to its employees, next is to the community and environment and finally to its stockholders. He believed if J&J focused on significance (patients and employees) first and relegated success (shareholder value), shareholder value would ultimately be realised.

And he was right. Additionally, every employee at J&J finds personal significance in their lives by the Credo.

Legacies are created daily

John Maxwell states the success of my day is based on the seeds that I sow, not the harvest I reap. Too often, leaders bypass the process of sowing seeds in favour of short-term results. This is what led leaders like Ken Lay to their ruin.

Sowing unwearyingly is better than instant results as real reaping is dependent on the seeds you sow today. Legacies are the results of giving today as sowing daily into the lives of others will compound over time.

Legacies are not created instantaneously. It is built daily through values, hard work, integrity of leadership and character. The choices you make every day with your time and efforts directly impact how you will be remembered. The secret of significance is determined by your daily agenda.

It's not about leaving a legacy, it's about living a legacy. Leaders have been conditioned to think about the future. But in doing so, they have forgotten about the present. And the present is how they create their legacy, claims author Shane Yount.

Legacies take years to build but can be lost in a moment. CSPAN commissioned a study to judge the 41 past American presidents on 10 leadership qualities. The top three presidents were Abraham Lincoln, Franklin Roosevelt and George Washington. The bottom two Bill Clinton and Richard Nixon. Both Clinton and Nixon would have ranked higher if only they had moral authority, which they tarnished due to scandals.

Legacies endure through succession

Finally, legacies must have succession. Peter Drucker said that there is no success without a successor. Abraham Lincoln's leadership ended slavery in America. After the war, Lincoln rebuilt the south, ensuring goodwill towards the freed black slaves. However, he was suddenly assassinated and Andrew Johnson took over as President. Johnson reconstructed the South's oppressive system of white domination and destroyed Lincoln's legacy of freedom stunting the civil rights movement and perpetuating injustice for another century.

As Maxwell rightly states, a leader's lasting value is measured by succession. If Lincoln had a successor who shared his vision, America's torrid racial issues may not have plagued them into the 20th century.

As leaders close out their tenure, leaders must channel their being toward helping their successor continue the legacy. The best leader creates new leaders, which includes developing, training and equipping others for leadership success.

The great leaders who leave lasting legacies are the ones who are most generous with their knowledge and expertise. These are the people who wind up creating the most economic value and create lasting leadership legacies.

Final thoughts

It is always morbid to think of death, but when we die, what will be said at our eulogy. We become immortal not through material possessions but through the legacies we leave.

People do not remember us for what we do for ourselves but for what we do for them. At the end of the day, no one remembers what numbers you closed for each of the quarters you were in charge. They do remember your leadership, service, character and inspiration.

Patch Adams' talks about love as his purpose in life. Lennon and McCartney, echoes Patch by saying in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you give. Likewise, your legacy is more dependent on what you give today, then what you take.

Roshan Thiran is CEO of Leaderonomics, Thestar

与人为善“最给力”

Tom Peters

1903年，英王爱德华七世(King Edward VII)出访巴黎。在他抵达时，街道两侧围观民众的态度明确表明，他在这里不受欢迎。但英王在前往爱丽舍宫途中以及在长达96小时的访法期间，始终保持着 泰然自若的风度。芭芭拉•塔奇曼(Barbara Tuchman)在《八月炮火》(The Guns of August)一书中记述道，爱德华七世片刻不停的施展魅力，迷倒了法国人。“在他所到的每处地方，他都发表了亲切而机敏的讲话，表达了对法国人的友好和 钦佩之情，谈到法国的‘光荣传统’和‘美丽城市’，称自己在访问期间感到‘由衷的快乐’，还表示相信英法两国已经‘一笑泯恩仇’”；而且，他是用娴熟的法 语发表这些讲话的。

当爱德华七世离开巴黎时，街道上的民众这次高呼道：“万岁，我们的国王！”虽然英法仍需为两国友好展开努力，但那次访问不到一年之后，两国便签署了英法协约，并由此改写了世界历史。

同 样是在巴黎，在爱德华七世访法的126年前，另一位魅力四射的人士以自己的方式迷倒了法国人。当时，处在萌芽期的美利坚民族缺少资金、缺少盟友，并处于节 节败退之中。作为他们的代表，本杰明•富兰克林(Benjamin Franklin)现身巴黎——更确切的说，是现身巴黎的各个沙龙。他深受巴黎上流社会女性的喜欢，并赢得了法国王室的宠爱。由于美国在萨拉托加对英国取 得一场不大不小的胜利，再加上富兰克林不知疲倦的魅力攻势，法国终于成为美国的盟友，世界历史也因此被改写。

这样的故事，我手中有成百上千，我的最新作品《小中见大》(The Little BIG Things)的创作动力便来源于此。

在 写书的整个过程中，最让人头疼的就是选择题词（阐述该书精髓的一句话）。我总共写了16本书，就这第16本的题词选得令我满意——这要感谢19世纪美国政 治家亨利•克莱(Henry Clay)：“细微之处的礼貌举止最令人感激和欣赏。”（第二名来自现代广告之父大卫•奥格威(David Ogilvy)：“我们送人不送到电梯口，而是一直送到街上。”）

好也罢歹也罢，我倒是被普遍视为一个热情激昂的演说家。或许是年逾65岁 的我开始变得温和起来。但我并不这么认为。如果说优秀的企业建立在出色的人才和极佳的人际关系之上——2010年是如此，1910年也是如此，毫无疑 问，1710年和1810年同样如此——那么它的基石就是得体、周到、心灵相通的倾听和赞赏的低语。事实上，克莱所说的“礼貌举止”，以及奥格威乐于将客 户送上停在曼哈顿街道旁的汽车的态度，就是企业成功的基础。

其实，我不是第一次采用这个主题。我第一本书——与鲍勃•沃特曼(Bob Waterman)合著的《追求卓越》(In Search of Excellence)——的签名是一个六字短句：“硬即软。软即硬。”我和鲍勃对1980年前后困扰美国企业界的问题进行研究时发现，企业及企业顾问把 事情都弄颠倒了。我们指出，最终，那些所谓的“硬数据”与“规划”，反倒是软的——因为根据我们近期的观察，前者极易被操纵；后者则通常是异想天开。那些 被商学院及类似机构所看贬的软要素，才是真正的“硬要素”：包括人的问题、组织内外部关系的特征与质量。

对这些问题的思考，让我想起了最柔和、大概也是人类交往中影响力最持久的一个词语：与人为善。小说家亨利•詹姆斯(Henry James)曾说过：“人生有三件大事。第一，与人为善。第二，与人为善。第三，与人为善。”我的观察是：与人为善行之有效，且善有善报！

依照我“硬”工程学背景的传统，我在一张PPT幻灯片上列出了一个等式，并玩笑地称它为“你所需知道的一切”：K = R = P（与人为善=回头客=利润）。

关 于“R”和“P”，证据显而易见：无论是街角的小店还是波音(Boeing)这样的全球性公司，其利润与回头客直接相关。关于利润与善意的联系，我所给出 的证据有：爱德华七世的神奇96小时、本杰明•富兰克林、以及从乔治•华盛顿(George Washington)到纳尔逊•曼德拉(Nelson Mandela)的一系列传奇故事。我的短文集证明，细小的礼节与惊天动地的事件之间存在着不容置辩的联系。

如果人与人际关系是企业成功的必要条件（我坚定不移地认为它们是），那么，得体、周到及诸如细心聆听之类的要素，应该成为管理准则中至高无上的法则。

我将以我的名誉担保：实际上“软”才是“硬”，而与人为善=回头客=利润。

过去是。现在是。未来也是。

《金融时报》

新婚夫妇如何投保？

虽说人都觉得不宜在2010年虎年内结婚，但却不难发现在今年内完婚的亲朋戚友多不胜数。

然而，一对对情侣忙着筹备自己的世纪婚礼之时，还会想到其他更重要的元素吗？

新婚夫妇会否考虑到另一半的保障呢？有了山盟海誓，是否应获取更实际保障，以防自己万一发生不测时，这头家还可以经营下去？

为了一探新婚夫妇“该如何投保？”、“投保时，该以谁为重？”、“该买哪类型保险？”等问题，《南洋商报》今期走访保险界、理财师及多对新婚夫妇，告诉您该怎么做。

结婚证书无金钱价值

对于新婚夫妇而言，“爱”应该怎么衡量呢？结婚时，双方所签署的结婚证书有什么意义？

理财师黄小翠指出，除了法律约束，很多时候结婚证书的金钱价值等于零。因此，投保才是为另一半提供生活保障的最佳方式。

“若伴侣比较富裕，结婚证书的法律约束能够确保他或她离世时，活下来的另一半可以合法分享其财产；但伴侣一无所有，这张证书是没有价值的。”

她认为，新婚夫妇在投保前，最重要拥有正确概念，即为对方负责，若另一半忽然离世，剩下的一半会不会有足够的保障。

惟这种观念无法勉强。她说：“有些人，甚至有了孩子，也不认同投保。

若新婚夫妇要投保，应该如何着手？

理财规划师黄凯顺认为，华人社会传统上都以男性为家庭的经济支柱，尤其是已婚男性身为一家之主，更需要完善的保险，即人寿、疾病及医药卡等，好让他若不幸入院，有人支付住院开销，有钱养病，同时在无法工作带来收入的同时，继续为家里带来金钱来源。

“以此类推，家庭主妇和小孩，由于没有赚钱，所以不需要收入保障，只需医药卡。”

医药卡是必需品

基本上，医药卡是每个家庭成员的必需品。

他解释，我国官方数据显示，意外率是低过9%的，因此，一般人尤其白领阶级因公司有提供社会保险（SOCSO）等福利，相较自雇人士，并没有这么需要意外保险。

他解释，人寿保险主要可分成四大项目，即保障收入的人寿保险、意外险、严重疾病险和医疗险。

婚前投保可婚后调整

婚后该如何调整自己的保险？结了婚才买保险更省事？

黄凯顺表示，每个人在不同的人生阶段都有不同需求，所以每个人都应该在开始面对社会经济负担时，就要投保，并在婚后调整。

他说，很多人都怕重新检视和重组自己的保险组合，因为感觉上之前的付出就会前功尽废。然而，只要概念正确，投保方式正确，随时都能够调整，而且不是以投资为前提的话，就算断保，重新再来也不是很大的问题。

说到如何在婚后重组本身及整个家庭的保险，他认为，目前最流行的投资联结保险是最好做规划的产品，因为它极具伸缩性。可以随时加，也可以减，而且不需要整个保险终断来调整自己的保险组合。

因此，他奉劝投保人向险经纪询问。

先分配后花费

很多年轻的新婚夫妇会说：“我们钱不够用，怎么还有多余的钱投保？”

黄凯顺认为，以目前马来西亚的生活水平和薪金水平，钱不可能不够用，最重要是懂得分配。

他建议，大家用2：1:1:6的比例来先分配，后花费的方式做个人或家庭的财务规划。

他强调：“用这个比例来分配，一定不会不够钱用。至多是没有多余的钱来花费。”

他坚信，只要谨慎理财，薪水再低的人还是与大家拥有一样的机会。并不会因为收入比较少而输掉机会。

“现代家庭问题就是钱财管理不当，其中保费超高却保障不足是最好的例子。”

他2:1:1:6的准则，是收入20%为长期退休规划，10%为家庭保险，10%为孩子教育基金及60% 为家庭开销。

“根据这样的比例来分配，就可以好好的分配金钱，为家人进行完善的投保。”

保费以家庭需求做考量

一个家庭内，应该着重于何者的保障？

黄凯顺认为，应该以家庭收入的比例为准则，若丈夫的收入占了家庭开销的70%，那么保险的保障就必须足够保障他那部分的收入来源，而不是所支付供款的物件来计算。

他补充，保费不是以个人年薪为考量，而是以家庭经济需求做考量。“如果家庭开销很大，保障的需求则更大。反之比较小。”

他说，若一个家庭收入高，生活简单，需求少，同样，保险保障的需求会随着降低。

南洋商报

懂得感恩的人更健康更快乐

感

恩确实有益健康。

不断有研究提出，保持感恩态度可以增进心理、情绪和精神健康。

过去10年进行的多项研究表明，经常充满感激之情的成人比不这样的人拥有更多活力、更多乐观、更多人际交往，以及更多的幸福感。他们抑郁、嫉妒、贪婪或嗜酒的可能性也更少。这些人挣钱更多，睡眠更深，锻炼更频繁，还拥有更强的抗病毒感染能力。

Michael Rubenstein for the Wall Street Journal

纽约州霍夫斯特拉大学心理学助理教授弗罗一天中最喜欢做的事就是在睡前给他四岁的儿子讲故事。

如今研究人员发现，感恩也会给幼儿和青少年带来相似的好处。研究表明，充满感激之情并做出感恩之举的孩子往往比其他孩子更少物质主义，学习成绩更好，定的目标更高，抱怨头痛肚子痛的次数更少，对朋友、家人和学校也更加满意。

纽 约州Hempstead霍夫斯特拉大学(Hofstra University)心理学助理教授弗罗(Jeffrey J. Froh)说，这些发现当中，有很多都是我们在幼儿园期间学到的东西，或者是祖父母外祖父母告诉我们的，而现在我们拿出了科学依据来证明。弗罗的很多研究 都是在儿童身上展开的。

加州大学戴维斯分校(University of California-Davis)心理学教授、感恩研究先行者埃蒙斯(Robert Emmons)说，关键是不要到感恩节才感恩。另外他还提到，一个人意识到自己受惠于人，就会意识到报答的必要性。

当然，表达感谢也是有可能做过头的，特别是如果你想通过送礼来表达感谢的话。弗罗说，如果感谢某人的方式与两人的关系不相称，比如说学生向老师赠送iPod，那就会引起怨恨、愧疚、愤怒和一种义务感。

感恩同样有可能陷入对接受感恩的人施加控制、并强迫对方对自己保持忠诚的误区。弗罗说，你可以将心比心地为你要感谢的人考虑，并发自心内地判断自己的本意，从而避免犯下这样的错误。

在 即将发表于《幸福研究杂志》(Journal of Happiness Studies)的论文中，弗罗及其同事对1,035名高中生进行了调查，发现最感恩的学生朋友更多，成绩也更好，而最物质主义的学生成绩更低，更容易嫉 妒，对生活的满意度更低。弗罗说，对物质主义的最佳疗法之一，是让人对其拥有的东西充满感激。

很大一部分感恩研究考察的都是关联性，而不 是因果关系；其实可能只是快乐、健康和成功的人要感谢的东西更多。但在《人格与社会心理学杂志》(Journal of Personality and Social Psychology) 2003年发表的一篇里程碑意义的研究中，埃蒙斯和迈阿密大学(University of Miami)心理学家麦卡洛(Michael McCullough)证明，“知福”确实可以让人感觉更好。

埃蒙斯博士说，感恩听起来简单，实际上它是一个需求很高的、复杂情感，要求人们进行自我反省，要有能力承认个人依赖于其他人的帮助，并要谦卑地意识到一个人的局限性。

感恩还让人们克服心理学家所说的“负面倾向”，即胶着于问题、恼怒和不公平而非积极乐观情况的固有倾向。根据对受911恐怖袭击事件和卡特里娜飓风影响的人们的研究，注重发生在人身上的正面的事情，可以帮助抵御忧伤情绪，并在有压力、悲伤或遭受灾难的时候增强韧性。

人 们能学会关注光明面，想要他们已经得到的并为此感恩吗？专家认为，这种性格特征有一半是遗传的，其余来自于经验，所以有充足的机会可以改变。 Candlewood中学校长格林（Andrew Greene）说，儿童和成年人都可以选择如何感受和看待世界，他说“意识到幸福”是弗罗博士研究结果的持久遗产之一。

对于岁数稍大的儿 童和成年人来说，培养感恩的一个简单方式是真正数数你的好事。记日记并定期记录当天你感恩的事情。要具体。弗罗博士说，日复一日列出“我的朋友、学校和 狗”意味着“感恩疲劳”。如果在日记里写上“我的狗在我悲伤的时候舔了我的脸”就让人耳目一新。一些人在他们的Facebook或MySpace页面里， 或是在线感恩小组里这样做。现在还有一个iPod感恩日记应用程序。真正的好处是改变你对世界的感受。寻找可以感恩的事情，然后你会处处都能看到可以感恩 的事情。

亲自表达感谢尤其有力量。一项研究显示，四年级学生进行“感恩访问”后，即使在两个月后他们仍对自己感觉良好，尤其是那些此前情绪不佳的人。

采取更乐观的思维模式也可以激发感恩。不要跟朋友一起发牢骚或表示愤怒，而要试着分享你感恩的事情。为了避免听起来像是自吹自擂，你要注重于赞扬其他人，比如，“我妈妈请了一整天的假，来看我的比赛。”

研 究发现，使用负面、贬损的语言，即使你对自己说，也会使你的心情变糟。在你的头脑里装满积极的思想，大声表达感谢和鼓励，寻找你周围可以感恩，而不是批评 的事情，尤其是你热爱的人。纽约精神病专家拉姆齐（Drew Ramsey）说，这是度过假期的基本方法。他说，感谢他们帮你应对日常家庭生活中必不可少的烦心事。

最后，假如你认为很多东西都是理所当然，那么就试试“人生真美好”这样的方法：相像如果没有配偶、孩子或工作这样的好事情，你的生活会是什么样。

Melinda Beck

华尔街日报

保險‧困境中最實際的保障工具

20多年前，若保險業務人員向您提及“保險”這字眼時，大多數人都會選擇回避，不想多談，擔心自己會被騙。但是，來到科技發達的今天，很多人都知道保險計劃的重要性了，除了“人壽”保險外，“醫療”保險也成為了現代人生活必備的條件之一。

在馬來西亞，醫療保障的范疇大概可分成4種，這包括住院和手術保險、疾病保險、住院入息保險計劃以及收入損失保險（Disability income plan)。

其中，住院和手術保險或俗稱“醫藥卡”最為普遍，這是因為醫藥費每年不斷高漲，購買醫療保險是一項長遠的投資，以在緊急需求時可派得上用場。

大馬保誠保險產品及行銷總裁邢詒旺表示，隨着社會不斷發展，醫療費也日益高漲，國人購買醫療保險的人數是有增無減。

他說，其次是許多人擔心退休后患上嚴重疾病，會消耗他們的銀行存款及公積金，因此額外購買一份醫療保險可給他們多一個保障。

“不過依然有很多人士對醫療保險存有誤解或偏見，認為購買醫療保險是一項零回酬、浪費的投資。其實，只要多加了解保險的本質和其功能，保險是困境中最實際的保障工具。”

他指出，公眾最好在健康情況下購買醫療保險，因為當患上疾病後，保險公司可能不接受投保。

還有，當購買醫療保險時，應該如實地披露病歷。若投保人沒有申報有關病歷，日後若舊病復發，保險公司有權利不做出任何理賠。

一般人對醫療保險的誤解：

1. 我的公司已經為我提供醫療保障

當您離開公司或達退休年齡，您的公司將不再提供任何醫療保障，那時候才考慮購買醫療保險，受保的機會比較低。


2. 我現在很健康，不需要任何保障

生活中處處有風險，沒人能預料明天的事，況且，越年輕購買保險，保費越低。


3. 若沒做出任何理賠，錢豈不是白給?

保誠PRUhealth計劃新添加的“無索償獎金(NCB)”功能，每一年都會送出“獎勵金”給那些在一年內不曾做出索賠的保單持有人。


4. 我的公積金足以應付日後開銷

調查已顯示約60%的員工在退休後的公積金不到11萬令吉，不足以養老，加上醫療費每年增長13%至15%，若不幸患上心臟病，一個心臟繞道手術（heart bypass）就可以花掉所有公積金。

星洲互動